Something Quick

I haven't posted much lately-last week was very busy at work and today was stressful until about 20 minutes ago when I got my city done and made the deadline, yippee. I'm either bored or super-busy it seems. I ended up doing a bunch of extra time on setting up the properties in the computer system for cities last week, so that cut into work time as well. I hate having that duty. A lot of us in the department get hours doing that, some more than others "glares toward supervisor's area" but I had to take others hours last week a few times and my Friday hours were busy AND I had a big city due Friday. *sigh* Oh well, that part is over. It really is surprising I got my stuff done for today with the time I had. Now I must wrap the rest of the week up before Thursday afternoon, because I'm taking Friday off. Yay, a three day weekend. No, not really yay...I'm moving. Yes, it's the big move and I'm not really looking forward to it. What I mean by that is that I really don't like moving. It's not that I don't want to move in with the boyfriend. I just don't like moving. Luckily I don't have a lot of stuff, that certainly works in my advantage. He has a lot but he hired movers, heh. Oh, has anyone else been craving a warm beach lately? I haven't been to Mexico in a few years and for some reason it sounds so nice, even though I've never been much for being hot. But with a pool and the ocean there how can you go wrong? The boyfriend and I are talking about going next spring. Well, I should get back to doing something somewhat useful, so this is it for now. Wish me luck on the move!

The Best Days

I'll start off by saying I'm still getting flowers! Can you believe it? He wants to get me flowers every day until Valentine's Day. When he said the roses represented "the past" he meant that the flowers each day are meant to convey two years of my life...14 days in February multiplied by two and there you have it, my age. So I still have a few more days of flowers to go. I'm not sure if anything is happening on Valentine's Day itself or not. I don't know what I should get him. Originally I thought we were going to keep it low-key but now I'm getting extremely spoiled. What do you get a man for Valentine's day?

Anyway, that's not what this post is supposed to be about. Hmm, I'm not sure how to start. I guess I think a lot about how much I love the boyfriend and he has definitely changed my life for the better. I had a low point in my life before meeting him...my self-esteem has never been good and it still isn't but I think it bottomed out due to various things that had happened in 2008, including job-loss and romantic rejection. Despite a lot of the complaints on here about small things I am much happier right now than I have been at other times. However, I still can't quite say I experienced the "best days of my life" so far with him...let me explain what I think these are.

The best days of my life happened one week a few years ago. I went to Japan, stayed in Narita (near Tokyo) and visited a guy I had been dating off and on for a while. We dated off and on through 2008, really, but that's another story. Anyway, I have a bad memory so I don't remember a lot of details about the trip. And no, it's not from drinking. I think I may have gotten tipsy from sake once. But it was so carefree...being on the other side of the world where I knew no one but him, having absolutely no responsibilities, no one to keep track of me. And well, we were completely in lust with one another at the time too so that was part of it. And honestly so far I think those were the best days of my life. I want to have a carefree trip like that with the boyfriend so I can say that time was with him. Because I love my time with him, and some carefree time with him would be even better! I'd love to be able to say the best days were with him, and I'm sure I will be able to at some point. I have a feeling I'll always remember that trip to Japan fondly though...

More Flowers!

I've received flowers every day this week...Monday, Tuesday and today. Monday was the red roses. Yesterday there were three white flowers...I'm horrible at distinguishing most flowers, but they looked like they could have been chrysanthemums? Today I got three more flowers! They are beautiful, but once again I don't know what they are. Shaped kind of like sunflowers with a smaller center. Yellow in the middle and light purple petals. I ruined part of one of them trying to get it in the vase but they still look good. When I asked about the roses on Monday he said they represented the past. I don't know what he's talking about at all, but he said I'd see soon. I don't know if he's going to try to give me flowers every day until Valentine's Day or something...it's crazy. :) Well, I've never had a boyfriend on Valentine's day before, so I think this makes up for it!

Smells Like Roses

My week started off with a surprise...I got in my car this morning, in a hurry as usual, and there were two red roses on my front window held under by the windshield wiper. It brought quite the smile to my face, though I had to grab them in a rush and put them in the seat and take off rather than go in and put them in water. That's what you get when you're me, eternally running late in an area where traffic is not your friend. I found a vase in the kitchen when I got to work, however, and they are currently sitting on a shelf above my desk. Too much danger of getting knocked over on the chaos that is my desk. This is really all I should write for now, though I want to write more. I have stuff I should do (aka work). And I am frustrated at my blog. I changed the layout and various settings and the comment/time posted/posted by area is messed up and ABOVE my post. I don't like it and I'm not going to grow to like it. I'm a creature of habit when it comes to this kind of stuff. :(

What is going on??

The "comments" are now right under the title of my post instead of at the end. I don't like that! And I can't find a way to stop it. Lame. :(

I didn't bring anything for lunch!

And I want something yummy to eat. All we have here is a vending machine with candy and chips and that's bad. Give me suggestions if anyone reads this! Hehe.

I SO Don't Want to be Here

You guessed it, I'm at work. I really don't know what my problem is. I've had much, much worse jobs that this one. This job saved me from the Safeway deli and I will be forever grateful. Well, not this exact job but the company anyway. This is not a bad place to work by any means. I have a nice, cool boss and most of my coworkers are cool to be around as well. Let me put it this way- as much as I complain about one of them, it isn't at the point where that person picks on me or anything so I can deal with it usually. But most days I truly find myself wishing I was somewhere else. I certainly wouldn't say ANYWHERE else, but somewhere else. The problem is, I don't know where. In a gorgeous house on a beach next to the ocean? Sure, that sounds great. But lets get serious...

Obviously I wasn't born into a trust fund or I would have talked about it by now. And I don't think I'd be working full-time. Probably volunteering and vacationing a lot. It has been 10 years since I graduated high school and I was the valedictorian of my class, though it was quite small. When I graduated high school people expected me to do something with my life. I expected me to do something with my life. Sure, I received college degrees but all I have to show for it now is a ton of debt. Why do I still think I need to find a field that "means" something to me, or that I feel like I was meant to do? I know a lot of people who go through life not doing something that they feel they were "meant" to do. My mom is an administrative assistant for an accounting firm, and she enjoys her job, but I doubt she feels like it was her calling. Most of the things I think it would be wonderful to do are extremely difficult to get into anyway. I think it would be great to be a writer, but I haven't written anything in ages and I don't even have any ideas anymore. Photography is something that I really like, but that's a pipe dream as well. I may have a slight knack for seeing pretty pictures, but it takes a lot more than that. And there's a part of me that would still like to go back to school and get my master's and become a counselor, but I'm still not sure that's what I want and I better be pretty damn sure before I even try to work something like that out.

Hmm...I guess that's all my brain can come up with in this area for now. I really don't know what I'm searching for, but will I know when I find it? Or perhaps I'm just being my whiny self.